Amazon

[Peter D]

Just come back from a cruise,there was a competition for the strangest pet,my wife won with a tin of salmon!

[Up the iron]

I went on a date last Saturday night, what a total disaster.

The girl told me over the phone she was expecting a baby.

So I went to the pub wearing only a nappy.

I felt like a proper idiot.

[Rothbury Boy]

You should be on the stage Mr.Iron.

[Up the iron]

I was sat in a popular "brit" bar in GA the other night with my mate when 4 drunk thugs started mouthing off at us.

"Pretend we're the police" my mate said.

Well, I only got half way through the first verse of Roxanne before they kicked the living daylights out of us.

[denandrose]

 

[Up the iron]

I get my personalised licence plate today. BAA BAA

Should look cool on my black jeep.

[Tony Gillam]

I was going to get a personalised plate but it was too expensive so I've still got AP05ERS. Better than my mates ancient Beemer though. His is P111OCK

[Up the iron]

I had a knock on the door earlier. It was plod.

"Mr Iron?"

Yes I replied.

I'm afraid your dog has been reported to have chased someone on a bike.

That cant be right, my dog doesn't have a bike.

[Aficionado]

Boom boom!!